So anyone who was around me throughout my pregnancy knew I was FREAKED OUT OF MY MIND about becoming a mom. I've always wanted to be a mom. The second Ryan and I got married all I wanted was babies, but once I actually got pregnant for some reason reality set in and I was soo scared. Just being completely responsible for another human being's survival...my brain almost exploded every day! But, the first time I felt her kick...it hit me...having a child is literally the most amazing thing I could do with my life. Now, don't get me wrong, the whole thing still seemed daunting, but at the same time SO exciting. Little by little I feel like I got to know my little Rosie while she was growing in my belly. I don't know how people can talk about pregnancy like it's a normal thing because I seriously NEVER got used to it. Every day it just blewww my mind that I literally was growing a human inside my body...like this little alien was just living off of me! IT'S CRAZY!!! And they start out so tiny tiny tiny! As she started to dance more and more in my tummy I felt more and more connected to her. She was my little creation! My body was creating a person! I'm telling you I know I sound crazy repetitive, but it was a HUGE deal to me! Even thinking about it now truly makes me feel crazy! It's SO AMAZING! Heavenly Father is just really amazing.
My pregnancy all in all was pretty blissful. I know a lot of moms are going to hate me for saying that, but man I just got really lucky. I'm counting my blessing on this one because I have a feeling karma will set in on the next one :) Up until week 38 of my pregnancy I honestly never really believed I was pregnant. I had energy, I wasn't uncomfortable, I LOVED being pregnant. But, this week...week 38 I started to feel it. I just felt huge. I was ready for Rosie to make her way out of my belly. I was just tired and my belly was just so heavy! I was at my parents home in Santa Barbara at this point and I would literally go in the pool and float every day...and I really mean every single day...because my tummy was so heavy! And man, for any moms who are nearing the end of their pregnancies, the pool is the most enchanting place. It like seriously heals your soul. You'll feel like a cloud. Go float. So, anyway, I was just feeling big and my feet started to swell a little, and swelling doesn't make anyone feel dainty that's for sure. So I was ready, but since it was my first EVERYONE was telling me, don't get your hopes up, it's most likely to be late...I wanted to fall over every time I heard that.
July 2nd, 11 days before my due date, I was on my way to my normal prenatal check up appointment and I got this super intense backache. It was only there for a few seconds and then it subsided. I didn't mention the back ache at my appointment just because I figured it was just my body saying that my belly was too heavy for my back or something. I really didn't think much of it. Then on my way home from the doctor, the back ache came again. I got home to Ryan and of course I just complained about how big I was feeling and how my body was done being pregnant. But it was just the usual end of pregnancy stuff, no way was I anticipating that I was going into labor.
The next morning I went to Costco with Ryan, my sister Kim and my brother-in-law Sam. I was just throwing things in the cart lifting this and that (I never was very good about the not lifting heavy things rule). But, every now and then this STUPID back ache would flare up again! I started to tell me sister about them and she mentioned that they might be contractions...I told her there's no way because they are way less painful than I would expect contractions to be and plus they were in my back! Then she explained to me what her contractions felt like...like it's more of a radiation pain that a pulling or ache. I told her that's kind of what they felt like, but I still didn't believe they were contractions, they just weren't dramatic enough! She decided to time them just in case. So about every seven minutes they would come...I still didn't' believe it. So I went on with my day as usual! Ryan went to his house to hang out with his Dad and I went with my sister to help decorate my cousin Denise's house. The back aches persisted and got to about five minutes apart. (Kim still timing them because I was still in disbelieve), which is when the doctor told me to head to the hospital, but I just wasn't convinced. In my mind contractions that were five minutes apart had to be way more painful, especially because my doctor said I wouldn't be able to talk or walk through them and I was able to do both!
So, I went on with my day. Eventually we made our way home. I floated for a little bit, but the backaches were ruining it for me. So I got out just sat on our back patio where my sisters, Cub and Kim, and my mom were sitting and chatting. Soon it became all of them teaming up on me trying to convince me to go to the hospital. I decided to call Ryan and see what he thought. His immediate reaction was, "Let's go to the hospital!" But our hospital was 40 minutes away so I didn't want to have to make the whole trip down there to just find out that I'm a sissy and the back pain is just a normal pregnancy thing. So it became him saying, "If you don't think it's bad enough, then we don't have to go." So of course my pride kicks in, and I decide that we shouldn't go. Ryan then texts me a few minutes later saying. "Let's go have a baby!" And then calls me trying to convince me that we should just go and if we get turned away we can just make an event of it and go out to dinner and what not. So much what him letting me decide... hahaha
I finally give in. We put our hospital bag in the car and head off. In my mind I was 100% sure we were going to be sent home so on the way down all I thought about was where we were going to eat after because at this point I realized I hadn't eaten all day. So we get to the hospital. We don't bring anything in just because we don't want to have to bring it all out and we make our way up to the delivery room. I get in there and these two sweet little nurses start to take care of me. They measure me and said I was dilated to a four. So...backaches=back labor. I didn't have any in the front ever! How was I supposed to know they were contractions! No one told me it might be in just my back! They didn't tell me anything more, but they did bring me some food, which was nice. Then they just starting taking all the regular vital tests. We still didn't know if they were going to keep us or not. At this point both Ryan's and my phone had died so Ryan ran down to the car to get the phone charger because of course of families were wanting minute by minute updates. While he was gone the doctor came in, this is three minutes after the first nurse measured me. My doctor measures me and says the nurse measured wrong and I was already to a 6.5. I kept asking them if I should plan on staying or not and by this time I finally got an answer. I was admitted. And my doctor said, "This is going to go real fast." Thank HEAVENS for Ryan and my family for making me go to the hospital! So my doctor broke my water and two more nurses came into room and helped get me all hooked up. This is when Ryan finally made it back into the room and when he had left nothing was really happening so when he walked in he was kind of freaking out, thinking something was wrong since there were a million things going on and a bunch of people in the room! He was like..."So are we staying?!" haha a definite yes. So after I got all hooked up we kind of just hung out waiting for the contractions to get crazier. They were still all in my back and still not very painful. I just kept thinking, this can't be what everyone is freaking out! It's not even that bad!
Soon I threw up everything I ate and then all the sudden my contractions started to hurt reallll bad. Now, I understood what everyone was talking about. I had been in the hospital for about two hours by now and was now dilated to an 8.5. Contractions were getting pretty crazy so I finally requested the epidural (I was planning on getting it the whole time, I just was waiting till it was bad enough to justify...pride ya know? :) I had to wait about 30 minutes for the epidural and that is when it finally got real hard. Ryan loves to tell everyone that I got mean in this 30 minutes because there was one point where he was telling me a joke, but I couldn't focus on what he was saying because of the pain so I said, "hold on one sec" literally probably calmer than I ever have. I was proud of myself for staying pleasant. So then my epidural doc came in and I told him immediately when he walked in that he was my best friend. He said "Just wait 15 minutes and we'll really be best friends then." Haha I got the epidural and DANG that was the best decision I ever made. As soon as it set in I was in heaven. Seriously it was bliss! We were cracking jokes with the nurse, just hanging out, telling stories. It was seriously a fun time! They give you this clicker that you're supposed to click if you can still feel pain, but for some reason I thought you were supposed to push it to maintain the epidural not intensify it, so I may have clicked it one too many times because I seriously couldn't feel a thing. Haha WHOOPS! But of course I wasn't mad!
So we hung out for about a half hour and then our nurse said it was pushing time! Now since I pressed that button too many times...pushing was interesting to say the least. I could not tell what I was doing, but apparently I was doing it right! It was probably about 10:30pm at this point on July 3rd and as much as Ryan loves America and it would have been amazing for him to have had Rosie born on the fourth, I did not want her to have the fourth as her birthday. I just wanted her to have her own special day so people would celebrate her and not the country with a side of her. Ryan agreed, but also would have been proud to have a patriot baby, so either was a win for him. I pushed for a little over an hour and I asked my nurse if we could get her out before the fourth! She said if that's what I wanted we were going to make it happen! So 11:48pm on July 3, 2015, 12 minutes before the Fourth of July my perfect angelic little miss Rosalie Jean Kimball made her debut. Weighing in at 7 pounds 10 ounces and 20.75 inches long, she was perfect. The cord was wrapped once around her neck, which Ryan didn't even tell me till the next day because the doctor got it off so fast it didn't even seem like a deal, but other than that her delivery was PERFECT! There are non-horrific labors! She was angelic and amazing and surprisingly so cute! She didn't look like a squished grandpa like I though she would, she just looked really Asian hahaha. After they got her all cleaned up they laid her on me and Ryan and I were in complete shock. We couldn't believe our eyes! We literally created a human and she was here! I've never felt more fulfilled in my entire life. She was everything I dreamed of and so so so much more. I, to this day, cannot believe that I got so lucky. I'm so blessed and so eternally grateful that Heavenly Father blessed me with this sweet, perfect child. There are no words to describe the joy. I love you sweet Rosalie Jean.
Sad she wasn't a fourth baby...
